not comfortable in the light

there are probably reasons that some individuals and interests 
want me to become official in some way 
probably in business or politics or whatever 
because then I would publicly belong to one country 
or group of countries 
so that other countries wouldn't be able to claim that I belong to them 

if I'm not official 
then I could seemingly belong to different countries 
that are enemies against each other 

but if I would become official 
then there would be an increased demand to fake my death 
in order to protect me 

and then I wouldn't be official again 
and then the process risk being repeated again 

so I'm better off not being official 
and probably most countries are better off if I'm not official 
but that's not how desire works 

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